As a not very expert practitioner of lucid dreaming, I’ve had more failures than successes. None has been more difficult than the one I’m going through now. When I can’t sleep, my mind spins. And when I can, it spins with the same wish, over and over and over. As painful present rhymes with the happier past, triggers abound, and the wishes just keep coming. The struggle is real.

When the night is dark and all is still
I chase elusive lucid dreams
Within the motley mash of things
In life and thought and things I’ve seen
I want to see you
I want to see you
I close my eyes and think of you
In waning moments every night
When all is quiet except my mind
Spinning and spinning, wishing and wishing
I want to see you
I want to see you
I’ve seen so many other things
I’ve willed my shuttered mind to see
Long lost friends and relatives
So why will you not come to me?
I want to see you
I want to see you
Wherever you’ve gone away from me
I need to know that you’re alright
Just a word, a sign, anything
But the echo of my hollowed heart
I want to see you
I want to see you
I want to see you
I want to see you